Eragon Gone Wrong!
by Padfoot and Stacey
Summary: Two best friends go into the magical world of Eragon to 'help' him on his journey, and are joined by another. Warning: highly illogical! Rated T just to be safe.
1. Racing

A/N This is my very first story, so please tell me how to make it better. Flame if you want, I don't care.

Disclaimer: I don't own Eragon or Harry Potter.

Chapter 1

"Hey Rose, what do you want to do today?" I said.

"Maybe we can go to your house and get some of our homework done. I think we should do that first, then we could go to do something a little more fun than sitting at a table doing absolutely nothing."

All in all, a good start to a Tuesday afternoon. It's sort of routine by now. We go to each other's houses to do homework, than do something fun.

Once we got to my house, we got right to our homework, a sure sign that today was going to be no ordinary day. Usually we say, we're going to do our homework, but put it off as long as possible.

"We're almost finished, why don't we do something else for a bit? Maybe we could watch a movie or something."

"Good idea, Rose. I'm bored half to death anyways, and it would be nice to take a little break."

So we settled down and decided to watch Eragon. It was always fun to yell at all the mistakes they made.

About halfway through the movie, when we were yelling at how wrong Saphira's voice sounds, I decided to get out the book and see if I could find any descriptions of her voice. When I opened it, I just happened to look at the very front page. There was a silvery type of substace covering it. It wasn't liquid or gas, somewhere in the middle of the two.

"Hey Rose, guess what? There's this stuff on the first page of the book, you know, the page right inside the cover. It looks like stuff from a pensieve, like from Harry Potter. Wanna see?"

"Really? Let's see what it is. Maybe it's magical," Rose said, laughing a little. "Let's touch it and see if it feels like anything."

But when we poked it, we were sucked into it, just like it was a pensieve! When we landed, we looked around. We were in a weird, non-air-conditioned, house. What's even weirder, we had popped up in front of a man and a woman dressed like they were from the 18th century. Once they started talking, though, we automatically figured it out.

"Jeod, who could they be? I've never seen them before, and they're dressed so unusually. Why, they're barely wearing anything!" Said the woman.

"Do I know you? If not, who are you and why are you in my home?" Asked the man, who presumably was Jeod.

"OH MY GOSH!!! We're in the world of Eragon!!!" Rose screamed. "You must be Jeod the merchant in Tierm! Glad to meet you. I'm Rose, this is Amber, and we fell in through a pensieve-type thing in a book."

"And we're dressed so weird because OUCH! Rose, what'd you do that for?" I said, as Rose kicked me in the back of the leg.

"We can't tell them where we came from!" Rose whispered in my ear.

"Why not?"

"They wouldn't help us out in anything except getting into an asylum!"

"Right."

"So?" Interupted a confused Jeod. "Why are you here and who sent you?"

"We're here because we thought it was somebody else's house?" I tried.

"Well it's my house, so get out!"

Once out of his house, we decided to find out what part of the story we must be in. To do this, we looked at the wanted posters. Roran wasn't on there yet, so we must be close to the beginning. After a look around, we saw a sixteen-year-old boy and an older-looking man that looked oddly familiar...

"ERAGON!!! BROM!!!" We both screamed at the same time. "OH MY GOSH!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU WOULD BE HERE AT THE SAME TIME!!! I ALWAYS WANTED TO MEET YOU!!!"

Evidently that wasn't exactly the right thing to say inside big, bustling, Tierm in the middle of the day with soldiers close by. Oops.

After a moment's hesitation, the guards standing close by started running after Brom and Eragon as though their lives depended on it (although, come to think of it, they could and probably would be killed if they let them escape), but the moment they had spared was a moment too long, because Brom and Eragon had gotten a head start.

When we noticed all the commotion, we automatically got out some megaphones (I have no idea how) and started doing commentary.

" AND BROM AND ERAGON IN THE LEAD! OOOOH! NICE SAVE, BROM, WE WOULDN'T WANT OUR MAIN CHARACTER BEING CAUGHT, EH? AND THAT'S ONE GUARD DOWN, GREAT JOB ERAGON, ONLY A FEW MORE TO GO! AND THERE'S GUARD NUMBERS 2 AND 3 DOWN, WAY TO GO BROM! ONLY 4 MORE SOLDIERS LEFT BEFORE THE END OF THIS COME ON BROM AND ERAGON!!! WOOHOO! YEAH!" We started cheering.

Suddenly, a change in events occurred.

"Rose, what are those, do you say?"

"I do believe those are urgals!"

"Okay." I turned my megaphone back on, as Rose, standing beside me, did the same thing. " AND AS WE COME BACK AFTER THE HALF, IT SEEMS THAT 3 MORE SOLDIERS HAVE FALLEN, BUT ON THE GUARDS SIDE, WE HAVE SOME NEW RECRUITS! PEOPLE, MEET THE URGALS!!! ROSE, WHAT DO YOU SUPPOSE ERAGON IS DOING?"

"I MUST SAY I HAVEN'T THE SLIGHTEST IDEA WHAT ERAGON'S DOING, BUT LOOK AT WHAT BROM'S DOING!!!"

"IT LOOKS LIKE BROM'S GOING TO USE SOME MAGIC HERE!!! THIS OUGHT TO MAKE THINGS A BIT MORE INTERESTING!"

Moments later, the Urgals were dead, and we found our megaphones destroyed. "HEY!!!" We screamed. "YOU BROKE OUR MEGAPHONES!!!

"Follow me." We jumped at the sound of Brom's voice, but did as he asked. We knew he would be dead really soon and didn't want to bother him. Plus, he looked kinda threatening with his sword pointed right at us while glaring.

**Two hours later **

** "**YOU TWO IDIOTS ALMOST GOT ERAGON KILLED!!! HOW WOULD YOU LIKE THAT?" Brom started to yell. We had just gotten back to the camp, and Brom was pretty mad.

Though we did care, we were too busy looking at Saphira, who was, if possible, madder than Brom. He didn't worry us, but we were going to watch out for her, because, as the saying goes, 'never poke a sleeping dragon in the eye', therefore it would be pure murder to mess with the already angry Saphira.

"So what?" I said in reply to Brom's yelling. "Eragon's a Mary Sue. Murtagh's WAY better than Eragon. You say so yourself. Eragon's being an idiot kills people."

"Amber!"

"What?"

"You forgot about the current situation, didn't you? Murtagh isn't part of the story yet. And did you know that you get the Idiot For The Year Award Second Place for being almost as stupid as Eragon by annoying Saphira to the edge?"

"Oh, umm, I'm sorry Saphira" I said.

Eragon asked a question, though. "Who is Murtagh?"

Rose replied for me. "Inside joke."

Eragon just rolled his eyes. This was going to be a long, long, trip.


	2. My Alone Time With Eragon

A/N I don't really have any real plans for this story, it was more of a starter type of thing, but I think it's going really good, and I feel the need to continue. I NEED more reviews!!! Oh, and I got the Eragon Mary Sue comment as welll as the whole 'people getting killed from his stupidity' from a really awesome list. It's called, 'Things I will NOT do in the Inheritance Trilogy'. Everybody should read my story, review, then go read that. Okey-dokey. And one more thing, now that i realize people like this story, I will DEFINITELY continue with the rest of canon book Eragon remade by me! I might possibly do an Eldest, and if i do Eldest, I will POSITIVELY do Empire.

Disclaimer: i don't own the Party Pooper song, Eragon, Harry Potter, Napolean Dynamite, Spongebob, or anything else somebody could possibly say I stole from somebody else.

* * *

My Alone Time With Eragon

It was about three days after 'those girls', as Eragon seems to enjoy calling us, were to join this strange group of people with short (and do I mean SHORT) fuses. Plus, I don't think it helped any that Rose enjoyed going hunting with Brome while I stayed behind with Eragon.

"EVERY PARTY HAS A POOPER..."

"FOR THE LAST TIME SHUT UP!!!"

"PARTY POOPER! PARTY POOPER!"

_Why must I be here with** her**? _Eragon asked Saphira.

_Just try to stand it, little one. He'll be back soon with the other girl._

_That makes me feel better._

"When you're talking with Saphira, I CAN'T HEAR YOU!!!"

"So?"

"Forget it. Your tiny brain probably can't comprehend it."

"Okay. What are you foing to do today, Amber?"

"Whatever I wnna do, GOSH!!!"

"Huh?

"So... I'm bored."

_Saphira, she's bored. This always means bad things happen._

"I KNOW!!! I'M GOING TO DO MAGIC!!!"

Suddenly Eragon clamps his hand over my mouth. "Don't shout out stuff like that!!!"

Ignoring him, I go to the first big twig I see on the ground and pick it up. I wave it around and say, "It'll do." I point it at Eragon. "Swish and flick. WINGARDIUM LEVIOSA!!!" I promptly throw a fit because it didn't work.

"Huh?"

"AVADA KEDAVRA!" And he bursts in a flash of green light!!! (Just kiddng. I couldn't do that. I haven't tortured him enough yet. Hehe.)

"What the heck?"

"Oh well. It's not like I really expected Harry Potter version magic to work here. I mean, it's a completely different story! Hey Eragon, can I ride Saphira?"

"NO!"

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! YOU'RE SO MEAN!!! WAAAAAAAAA!!!

"FINE!"

_"Yesssssssssssssss!"_

Once we had gotten up about a good 15 feet in the air, I noticed that if _somehow, _Eragon fell off of Saphira, he wouldn't die, so I could still torture him, he wouldn't break any bones or anything else major, and, more importantly, I wouldn't fall! As soon as I was done devising my evil plan of torture, I pullled a pair of jumbo sissors out of my pocket (A/N Again, I don't have the slightest idea how, but we can fit the universe inside of our pockets ((nudge nudge wink wink)) and things pop up their at will) and promptly snipped Eragon out of his seat.

"AAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!"

"HAHAHA!!!"

_Girl, if you hurt him, I'll..._

"Saphira, that was you, wasn't it? And dont' worry 'bout it. I wouldn't kill him off before I get to meet the whole lively gang later on, right?"

All I got in response was a low warning growl. When we got back down, Eragon seemed just fine, except for a slight headache. I thought he needed a little cheering up, so I pulled a big-screen TV and a generator out of my pocket. After that, I settled on a movie. Of course, it was the movie that was pretty much responsable for my being here. Eragon.

"Hey, Eragon, wanna watch Eragon?"

"No."(_one, two, three)_"What?"

"Well, you have a movie made about you. Just watch it if you want to understand."

"Fine."

And with that, I turned on the TV, pulled a DVD player out of my pocket, pulled out the Eragon movie, and turned on the movie.

* * *

A/N I bet you're all wondering how that's going to go, huh? Well, you're going to have to wait to find out, cause the next chapter isn't going to show it, but the chapter after that is, and if you want to see it, you're going to have to review. Oh, and if you put me on your faves, then I expect a review, wouldn't you? 


	3. Rose's Alone Time With Brom

A/N Yeah, This one's pretty much what Rose and Brom were doing while Amber and Eragon were alone. I never knew hunting could be so hard...

Disclaimer-I don't own Eragon, or anything else I might quote or use for that matter.

* * *

Rose's Alone Time With Brom

"Don't. Make. A. Sound." Brom whispered.

"HEY, DEER AND RABBITS AND ALL THE OTER CUTE CUDDLY ANIMALS! RUN, CAUSE BROM'S GONNA KILL YOU IF DON'T!!!" Rose screamed, scattering what was left of all the cute, cuddly animals that were the targets for Brom's hunting trip. She just had to come along with Brom while he was hunting, because otherwise he would be happy, and we can't let that happen, can we?

"I SAID TO SHUT UP!"

"Poke. Poke. Poke. Poke" Said Rose, while poking Brom in the back with a long stick she had found on the ground.

"STOP POKING ME!!!"

"You really shouldn't yell. You might scare away all the animals."

Brom ignored her and took aim at a nearby rabbit, but just as he was about to shoot it dead, something hit him in the head. He turned to see Rose, standing there with her stick.

"That's not a good way to hunt. You need a gun. But I can't do that, cause then that would count as though i'm going to supply the Varden with firearms, and I can't do that." Said Rose, pulling a rather long list out of her pocket. "It says so on this list titled 'Things I Will NOT Do In The Inheritance Trilogy'. It says right here 'I will not supply the Varden with firearms'. And I will follow this rule until your dea... er... I mean, because I feel like it. So there."

"Okay, we are going to try something new. You are going to stay here and keep watch for urgals or whatever else might come and eat you, while I go and hunt." And with that, Brom stalked off deeper into the forest, leaving Rose all alone.

As soon as Brom was gone, Rose started to gather acorns, rocks, and anything else that was at least somewhat like that off of the forest floor, as she followed Brom. For some reason, whether it was that old Brommy had gone deaf or something, he didn't here Rose walking very loudly, but still hidden, behind him. He didn't notice anything out of the ordinary, until an acorn hit him on the head. Rose was smarter than your average thirteen-year-old girl, and she had taken advantage of it by gathering junk to throw at him.

"FIRE!!!" Shouted Rose, as a volley of acorns, pebbles, and various other stuff hit Brom in the head, thrown from a giant net that Rose had pulled out of her pocket. She then started to poke him in the head.

Ignoring her, he shot two rabbits (the girls refused to eat anything he hunted) and dragged her back to camp, getting hit in the head the entire way. He had no idea what the Rose and Amber had planned for him and Eragon that very night.

* * *

A/N I hope you guys liked it, even though ti wasn'r very good. next chapter Rose and Amber go all techno on the guys. Lets hope they survive through it! If you want it, though, I want reviews. Yeah. 


	4. Movie Night!

A/N I know you all wanted to hear Eragon's reaction to his own (badly done) movie, but I first had to do Rose/Brom so that Rose could help me with the movie comments, and Brom could be there for future torture. I'm so mean. I mean, Brom's not even going to be there for very much longer, right? It's almost my birthday!!! I know, sometimes I can be random to EXTREMES. But that wasn't too random, I hope? Okay, if you put my story on your alert list or favorites, you need to review. Alrighty then.

Disclaimer: I don't own own the Eragon book, Eragon movie, and let's see, what else? Anyways, you get the picture, right? Right.

* * *

Movie Night

I was about to start the movie, when we heard something very extremely loud coming from the forest behind us. We turned, and noticed that it happened to be Brom! And he was dragging Rose by the ear with one hand, and holding two (ew!) dead rabbits in the other.

"Hey, Rose! do you wanna watch the Eragon movie with us and be loud and annoy the real Eragon even more than his character does, and do the same to Brom?"

"Hey, I'd love to do that!!! That'd annoy the Bromster even more than anything else i can think of!!!" Shouted Rose.

" STOP CALLING ME THAT!" Shouted Brom, who is now named the Bromster.

"No." We both said in unison.

Brom sighed.

**Highlights from the movie**

"IT'S ALAGAESIA, NOT ALAGAESHA!" We shouted at movie Brom, a little under five seconds into the movie.

"THAT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN YET!" "Various times throughout the story.

"HER VOICE IS TOO HIGH, SHE AND ERAGON ACT LIKE A MARRIED COUPLE, SHE WOULD NEVER SAY THE WORD STUPID" Us on Saphira.

"TO THE BATHROOM!!!" Us after the oh-so-stupid Eragon line, and I quote "I'm the rider and I say we go!"

"MURTAGH'S SUPPOSED TO BE CUTE, NOT BUTT-UGLY!"

"MURTAGH'S SUPPOSED TO BE FORCED TO FIGHT, NOT IN AN JAIL CELL SCREAMING FOR THEM TO LET HIM OUT SO THAT HE CAN FIGHT!!!"

"EVERYBODY'S WAY OOC!!!"

"THAT MOVIE SUCKS OUT LOUD!!!" We say at the end, as we throw popcorn at the very expensive TV. (A/N I could have gone on for probably fifty chapters ((at the least)) on all the mistakes there were, but I decided to cut it really extremely short and do two or three of my favorite dominants. Yeah.)

**Four hours later**

"When do you think they will stop wondering at the technology and asking us if the movie's real?" Asked Rose.

"I have no idea, and Eragon, the movie is only slightly real, 'cause lots of this stuff is worng, or did you not listen to us?" I said, as Eraogn asked once again if it was real.

Rose apparantly hadn't annoyed them enough just by ranting and screaming throughout the movie, because while that may have caused mental pain, it didn't cause them any physical pain.

"Hey guys?" Rose callled. "If you want to know how it works, just break the red skinny things sticking out of the back."

After about ten seconds worth of brain-damaging shocks, the TV burst in a puff of pretty pink smoke.

"Alrighty then, bedtime!" Rose yelled, and we raced to our sleeping bags at the other side of camp to avoid two seriously ticked off guys.

* * *

A/N I hope you liked it! It was the chapter I was looking forward to since chapter one! Well then, I want at least three sincere reviews for this chapter, not just "it was funny", OK? OK. I think I might just skip a bunch of the book and go right to an exciting part so that I can bring in my other OC's withen two or three more chapters. Yeah. This is going to be fun. 


	5. New Guy

A/N I know this stuff isn't supposed to happen in this order, but when we mess stuff up, nothing happens in the right order. So I think I'm going to bring in a new OC soon, so this chapter has to be here before that happens. Oh well, no OC's coming in this chapter, but this chapter adds Murtagh in. He's my fave canon character, even if he is slightly messed up. But I refuse to believe he only gave in because of the Twins' torturing. Galbatorix forced him to say those words by some form of a type of mind control. Maybe it was blood control (see Doctor Who Christmas Invasion episode to know more). And he will NOT be captured by (as alsdssg ((thanks for some inspiration!!!)) put it) our favorite hormonal hormonal teenager and his hormonal dragon OR (again alsdssg) a hormonal dragon-less teenager with zero magic, A.K.A Eragon/Saphira and Roran. That makes us happy, doesn't it? Anyways, on with the story!!!

Disclaimer: I DON'T OWN!!!

* * *

New Guy

After about two weeks after the movie episode, we were setting up camp when we heard a funny noise.

"Rose!" I called. "What do you think that sound is?"

"I don't know!" Rose yelled back. "But I think Eragon's supposed to be a major 'tard and get him and Brom caught by the Raz'zac pretty soon!"

While we were doing this, Eragon and Brom walked up to us. As we looked at them, waiting for them to tell us why they interrupted us, the wailing type of sound continued.

Finally, Brom spoke. "The sound happens to be Dras-Leona. You two come on and hurry up! We've go to get in there and back before nightfall!"

"Fine, grumpy." Rose said in response.

"Why isn't yon hormonal teenager talking?" I asked. Brom just walked away, out of camp with Eragon, leaving us to follow the two, knowing exactly how this night was going to end.

**A while later**

We had gotten out of Dras-Leona. Sort of. Well, we were standing in the gates hurling rocks at the guards with the slingshots we pulled out of our pockets (we didn't think it was fair to use guns) while Brom and Eragon fought with their swords. We were doing pretty good considering the fact that Eragon's a major 'tard and doesn't realize that Brom is smart enough to save himself, when the Raz'zac swooped down on us.

"And Brom gets hurt and they both get captured, yadayadayada, blahblahblah." We both said.

"Wait a second." Rose said. "If they get captured, so do we!"

Once we realized that, we stole off back to camp to find some guy that we knew we should know. He was kinda cute, or at the least, a much, MUCH cuter version of Eragon. He was ruffling through something that looked suspicously like...

"HEY!!! THAT'S MY BACKPACK!!!" Rose screamed at him. He looked up, surprised to see us both standing there. When he turned towards us, we realized who exactly it was.

"NO WAY!!! MURTAGH!!!" We both screamed.

"NOW ERRY (That's what I decided to call him for sheer annoyingness) WILL UNDERSTAND SOME OF MY COMMENTS!!!" I shouted.

"NOW THE BROMSTER HAS TO DIE!!! NOOOOOO!!! WHO WILL I ANNOY?" Rose cried

"Maybe you can annoy him?" I suggested.

"Good idea." She replied.

"I try."

"I'm sorry for interuppting your... er... _private_ conversation there, but who are you, what are you doing in this camp, and what is this?" Murtagh asked, holding up Rose's MP3 player.

"You have NO right to be going through my personal stuff, Murtagh." Rose said, not bothering to answer him as she yanked her stuff out of his hands.

"How do you know my name?"

"You're one of the _better_ characters in the story."

"What story?"

"The Inheritance Trilogy."

"Who are you two?"

"I'm Rose, and this is Amber."

What are you doing here?"

_"Honestly, _do you ever run out of questions?"

"You still didn't answer my question."

"From the fact that you were going through _my stuff, _I could ask you the same question, if I didn't already know." Rose replied.

"Now come on, we have to rescue Erry!" I said to cut them off. Rose was enjoying herself, while Murtagh had gotten overly annoyed, and was now extremely confused to top it off.

"Don't forget the Bromster!"

"Right. Him too."

"Now come on Murtagh, we have to rescue them from the Raz-zac!" We said, and, with that, Rose dragged him off, with me coming behind with his bow and arrows he had left on the ground (he had his sword), all the while both of us explaining what had to be done.

**After the big rescue**

"Brom's hurt!!! I have to heal him!!!" Erry said as soon as we go tback to the camp. He and Murtagh had acquaintanced along the way.

"Erry, do whatever you have to, but don't kill yourself, okay?"

"Of course I won't kill myself!!! AND DON'T CALL ME ERRY!!!"

_'What about Arya?' _I think

**After the Bromster's death and funeral**

Eragon was in mourning, but things had to continue. He and Murtagh sparred frequently, and argued even more often. It was so wierd that they drive each other crazy now, but when the time comes, Mr. No Feelings (Murtagh, of course) and Yon Hormonal Teenager will be the best of friends later. Weird how that works out, isn't it? We amused ourselves by annoying Murtagh half to death, as we had decided not to annoy Erry while he was in mourning. I mean, if Murtagh hadn't kept him busy all the time with training, he would be MAJORLY depressed! All in all, it was pretty boring. Until we got to the Hadarac.

* * *

A/N That's the end of that chappy, I hope you like Eragon's nickname. I myself thought it pathetic, not to offend the die-hard Eragon fangirls out there. I'm not a die-hard fangirl, but if there's one awesome character, it's gotta be Murtagh. That was a long chapter! In the next one, a new OC comes in to play!!! I want a few GOOD, SINCERE reviews before I make another chapter, okay? Okay. As Rose would say, toodles!!! 


	6. Snickerdoodles and fudge bisciuts

A/N Chapters will be coming slightly slower than they have been, because I'm trying to make them better and longer. By the way, I got reminded that Rose invented the nickname Erry. Anyways, I said I would get a new OC out, and so here you go!!! Enjoy!!!

Disclaimer: GRRRR!!! I DON'T OWN!!!! GET THAT THROUGH YOUR HEADS, PEOPLE WANTING TO SUE ME!!! I **DON'T **OWN!!!

* * *

Sninkerdoodles and fudge bisciuts

About a week after meeting Murtagh, we were back to annoying Erry. We did many, many small tricks, but the big one was done on both of them.

One day, we were **bored**. Majorly bored. So we decided to play a trick on Mr. No Feeling and Yon Hormonal Teenager. Rose pulled a microwave out of her pocket, and I pulled out (drum roll please)... ten jumbo boxes of Hot Pockets!!! We then proceeded to heat up the Hot pockets, leaving one half scorching hot, and the other half so frozen they would cause one heck of a hit on _whatever _unfortunate target it slammed into. We then loaded one scorcher in one potato launcher, and one freezy into another. We kept on doing this until all the snacks were loaded into potato launchers. Rose then called Murtagh, while I called Erry.

As soon as they got there, they wanted to leave.

"FIRE!!!" We both shouted, as we hit a button that launched all the Hot Pockets at the two unfortunate guys. As we did this we sang/screamed "HOT POCKETS!!!" Like in the commercials.

A while later, when Erry had healed them both (we were chanting "MARY SUE! MARY SUE!" the entire time) and we were listening to ipods and MP3 players, a weird thing happened. We were actually all calm, of course Rose and I were both thinking of things to do to Erry and Murtagh (A/N I refuse to use any other name than Yon Hormonal Teenager and Erry. Say Erry out loud. Sounds like Hagrid saying 'Harry'. hehe), but we weren't annoying the heck out of them for once, when we heard somebody crashing through the trees behind us. We looked and saw... SARAH!!!

"YEAH! AND YOU CAN TELL ALL YOUR BUDDIES TO BACK OFF, CAUSE YOU DONT WANT A PEICE OF ME!!! " She was shouting at the animals and branches in the forest. She then happened to notice where she was. "HOLY SNICKERDOODLE!!!" It just so happens that Sarah is a die hard Murtagh fangirl. Ironic, huh? She also happens to be one of our very best friends.

"ROSE!!! AMBER!!! WHERE THE HECK AM I? AND WHERE THE HECK HAVE YOU TWO BEEN? EVERYBODY'S BEEN SEARCHING!!!" Sarah shouted. That's when she noticed Murtagh. "OH FUDGE BISCIUT!!! MURTY!!! OMG!!! AM I IN ERAGON, MURTY?"

"Yes, you're in Eragon." I answered. "How'd you get here? Did you pop up in Jeod's house too?"

"I got here through this weird, pensieve-like thingy in your Eragon book. And no, I did not end up in Jeod's house, I ended up in the middle of nowwhere. Right through those trees. So close to an Urgal camp, I could have reached out and touched them!!! And they smelled BAD!!! They reeked!!!" She said, all the while hugging an obviously confused Murty.

"What are you wearing?" Murty cut in.

"It's the same trash the other two were wearing when they popped up." Erry said.

"IT'S NOT TRASH! IT'S A BLUE MINISKIRT AND BROWN TANKTOPS!!!" We all shouted at them.

"Okay. Okay. We won't call it trash." Murty and Erry both said.

"WILL YOU GET OFF OF ME?!?" Murty shouted at Sarah.

"WAAAAA! YOU'RE SO MEAN!!! WAAAAA!!!" Sarah cried, letting go of Murty and running over to us as though deeply hurt.

"I'm not going to give. You and I both know that you're faking." Murty told her, smirking at her perofrmance.

"Yeah, that's how Amber got me to let her have a ride on Saphira." Erry said, as I glared at him.

"Fine." Said Sarah, going back over to her Murty. (Sarah and I duck as we are pelted with popcorn from other Murtagh fangirls) As she slapped him, he grabbed her hand.

"Stop that!!!" he cried.

"Why?" Sarah said, as she stuck out her bottom lip. "Awen't you my fwiend?"

"NO!!! I AM DEFINITELY NOT YOUR FRIEND!!!"

That was definitely not the right thing to say. As soon as he finished saying that, Sarah's eyes narrowed. "Oh you think you're so good!!! It's not like I don't know who your father is!!! You've got more to be ashamed of than Galbatorix himself!!! And you're not even done!!! Before Erry's even fully trained, you set out to bring him to the Empire!!! And you suppossedly swore you were never going back!!!"

Murty looked surprised. "What do you mean, you know who my father is? Are you some kind of fortune teller?"

"I'm not talking to you." Sarah said, turning away and going into the tent Rose and I shared. She could tell because ours was nicely decorated.

"Wow." Rose whistled. "You actually made Sarah, the biggest Murtagh fangirl we have ever known mad at you. I didn't think that was possible."

"I can't believe you just said that!!!" I will never talk to you as long as I live!" I shouted to Murty, running to the tent to comfort Sarah.

**About a week later**

Since Murty had refused to apologise, Sarah, fangirl or not, decided that she would torture him the same as I did to Erry.

"Oh, STACEY!!!" Sarah screamed at Murty. "We have to leave! Erry says if you don't come on he'll leave you!"

"My name is not Stacey!!!" Murty told Sarah.

"Yes it is, Stacey!!! Stop being in denial all the time!!!"

Ignoring her, Stacey/Murty walked towards where the other three were standing. "Do we have to keep these three with us?" he asked Erry.

"YES YOU DO!!!" we all yelled at the two. Both guys looked like they had just won gold at the Olympics then told they wouldn't be getting the medal. Little did they they know that soon Stacey would have a test of willpower, and all three of us would be extremely usefull. We had it all planned out.

A/N Sorry for the long wait! I hope you all like it! Next chapter might be a description of all three OCs, if I get any reviews that think this is a good idea.


	7. Info on the OCs

Hey, sorry for the long wait, the document uploader wasn't working at first, then I was just too lazy to upload it, along with various other things. First chapter posted since my birthday!!! WOOT!!! I thought I'd make this one all about the OCs, just because the person that happens to be Sarah requested it. Enjoy!!!

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**Amber - **I, eragonharrypotterfan, play Amber. I came up with the name just because I needed a name to go by, and it was the first one that popped up in my head. I enjoy annoying main characters, because they are almost always over-rated. Especially Eragon. I enjoy seeing how much more annoyance Stacey, A.K.A. Murty, A.K.A. Murtagh (for the one person who asked who Stacey is) can take than Erry. I find that loads more fun than some of the other stuff I have to do at school, home, etc., etc., etc. The character is based on me and what I would do in Amber's place. 

**Rose** - The Abnormal Camel, a superb writer, happens to play the character Rose. She is Rose because we are both Doctor Who fans, she more so than me. She enjoys seeing how many Dalek stick figures she can draw before our teacher tells her she can draw Doctor Who stuff later, after she does her work. Just kidding!!! She does enjoy drawing Daleks, though.

**Sarah** - Kyo, not a writer, though she is a great source of ideas, is the biggest freakin' die-hard Murtagh fangirl in the flippin' world. I'M. NOT. JOKING. She's a bit of a spaz, though. She came up with Holy Snickerdoodle and Oh Fudge Bisciuts out of some odd dream, as well as came up with Hot Pockets from some Comedy Central Comedian she saw. **I'm taking over!!! HEHEHE!!! It's a hot pocket hot pocket. It's a hot pocket inside a hot pocket. It tastes just like a hot pocket! I'm gonna go stick my head in the microwave now! Me-Kyo!!!! Give me back the computer NOW!!! Kyo-NO!!! I enjoy moonlight dinners, long walks on the beach, and intellectual conversations. Me-YOU DO NOT!!! Kyo-DO TOO!!! HERE'S YOUR STUPID COMPUTER BACK!!!** Sorry about Kyo. I said she's a SPAZ!!! (A/N She really is sitting next to me right now)

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Well, here's your chappy, sorry about the long wait. See ya'll later!!! 


	8. Capture and Swordplay

A/N I hope you enjoy this one. I had Kyo asking me to make an info on the OC's chapter, so I made one. This one's making the story move a little faster. I didn't have Eldest with me at the time, so I changed the capture scene a bit, so I do know that it's different. Enjoy!!!

Disclaimer: I don't own Eragon, Doctor Who, that texting commercial, Harry Potter, or anything else I might quote or use, for that matter.

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**Capture and Swordplay**

As Amber, Sarah, and Rose rode on their newly bought horses (it took much pestering of Stacey), they were talking of what the urgals would do about the capture of Erry they knew was in their near future, when they saw three extra people.

"I think they'll ignore us three." Amber said.

"No, they'll take you two, but I'll be busy hiding behind Stacey, so they won't notice me." Sarah stated.

"Most likely they'll take you, Amber, but not us two."

"Why me?"

You're around Erry most." Said Rose.

"Yeah, that's _so _obvious." Amber said sarcastically.

"But it is!!!" Said Rose and Sarah.

"Fine, whatever."

They both rolled their eyes. Amber could be really blind sometimes. Just then Erry and Stacey looked back their way. "What are you three talking about? It doesn't sound like a plot, as I didn't hear any of the dreaded nicknames we were given." Stacey said.

"Well then, Stacey, you must not have been listening very hard, have you?" Sarah said, barely concealing her laughter as Mr. No Feeling's face flickered with fear at what they might have been planning. However, his face went back to it's mask-like features a half a second later. He turned around, and the girls shared a silent laugh.

"Brilliant." Whispered Amber.

"Bloody fanTASTic." Whispered Rose, and all three burst out laughing.

"Now, we're going to set up camp, and you three are going to help. If you don't, I'll throw those stupid little toys in the next lake, stream, or river we come to." Stacey paused, obviously not happy with being ignored by us. "What are they called? The little things you stick in your ears?"

"Ipods? Or MP3 players?" Rose asked.

"Both."

"TSNF!!!" Sarah screamed. We all laughed.

"Huh?" More laughter.

"If you don't know, we won't tell you." Rose said pointedly.

"Tell me!!!"

"OMG! INBD!" Amber yelled. Stacey rolled his eyes.

"Just help." He then ended the conversation.

* * *

A while later, while the Amber, Rose, and Sarah were relaxing, and Erry was hunting, while Stacey was keeping an eye on them, the thing they were talking about happened. Erry suddenly sprinted into the camp. "I (heavy breathing)... found (ditto)... footprints!" He said, panting. The three girls nodded knowingly and exchanged knowing looks, while Stacey jumped up and unsheathed his sword, looking, for just a moment, surprised. 

"NO (faked heavy breathing)... FREAKIN' (ditto)... WAY!!!" Amber yelled.

"They were urgal ones, weren't they?" Rose asked.

"Urgal whats?" Erry asked stupidly.

"FOOTPRINTS, YOU DOLT!!!" Rose shouted, exasperated.

"Ummm..." Erry said.

"Yup." All three said together.

"All right, let's go." Amber said. "We've got to hurry up or... URGAL!!! Ewww, it smells, and it's super ugly."

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A/N: The whole scene is happening, the girls have guns, and it's nearing the end. 

"PUT ME DOWN, YOU UGLY BRUTE, OR I'LL BLOW YOUR FREKIN' HEAD OFF!!! DOWN, I SAY, DOWN!!!" Amber was screaming as loudly as she could, which is pretty dang ear-splittingly loud, as an urgal picked her up and slung her over it's shoulder, Shreck style. Meanwhile, Erry was being conveniently knocked out. Soon they had done the same to Amber, and were on their way to deliver their 'luggage' to Durza.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!? GET YOUR BUTT BACK OVER THERE AND HELP AMBER!!!" Sarah screamed at Stacey.

"Sarah, stop screaming. You know it'll all work out in the end." Rose said, surprisingly calm. "I mean, we even predicted it. Now Let's go back to camp and find out how Stacey really got The Hormonal Idiot out of his circumstance."

"Fine." Sarah grumbled. "But I'm not helping Erry escape prison, only Amber."

After they had finally got back to camp, Stacey was pacing, Saphira was looking irritable, Sarah looked ready to have a meltdown, and Rose was ready to help. Maybe not excited about helping, but she'd help if it meant peace and quiet for a few minutes.

"Alright," Rose started. "stop moping and get over here, Sarah. If Amber is getting out, then we need to do things ourselves. Stacey, we're going somewhere, you just worry about Erry, don't do anything else."

"No, Rose, don't leave quite yet. You won't hold up against any largde amount of urgals if you can't fight in hand-to-hand combat. Let's see what your skills are."

"I'll use a gun."

"A what? Anyways, I still need to know how good you are."

"I'm not using a sword and you can't make me."

"I will!!!" Sarah said. She always wanted to learn how to use a sword.

"Alright, let's begin. Here, use my sword, but if you break, dent, scratch, or do anything else to it, I will personally kill you for that." Stacey said, all in a calm voice, as if speaking about the weather. Sarah glared at the threat. Nobody says ANYTHING like that to her.

"How dare you!!!" She said, barely concealing her laughter. "I take that as a major blow to my emo-like pride! As an emo yourself, you should know better!"

"Emo?" Stacey asked, confused. I guess emo isn't really a word for them yet.

"I'm not even going to bother to explain. You can listen to Emo Kid on my MP3 Player later. Though you won't understand what the words are. Besides, I'm not even using your sword. I'll use mine." Sarah said testily, pulling a full sword out of her pocket, sheath and all, with a flourish. Stacey ducked to avoid getting hit.

"Alright, lets begin." Stacey said, ready for this to be over. Rose snorted and left the campsite to do whatever, as long as she wasn't there. That way she couldn't be called as a witness to whatever Sarah was going to do.

A few seconds later, Sarah noticed she was gone, and called her name. "Rose? Where are you?"

"Oh, I'm just going for a walk. You two do whatever it is you were going to do."

"Okay" she called, then turned to Stacey. "Time to meet your maker." She said playfully. She knew he was much better than her, but there was no way she was letting him know that. Murtagh swung his sword at her, and she screamed.

"Maker, eh?" he said, raising his eyebrows at her.

"Yup." she said a hint of malice flickering in her eye. Stacey knew that look. But he was too slow. She picked up a rock and threw it at him with all her might. "Take that!!!" She yelled, picking up more rocks and throwing them.

"Okay, no more rocks."

"Okay." Sarah said, and pulled a bebe gun out of her pocket. Stacey ducked. He knew you never messed with Sarah, and he should have remembered that. She shot the gun until she ran out of bullets to shoot, and promptly flopped down on the hammock the girls had put together earlier. Stacey sighed. _Never mess with Sarah._ He thought to himself, and wnt over to Saphira to discuss plans for helping Erry.


	9. Rescue

A/N: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry for the long gap between these two updates!!! I hope you all haven't given up on me! I changed this scene from the book so that it would fit, but oh well. Well, enjoy!

Disclaimer I don't own, etc., etc., etc., you know the drill.

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**Rescue**

It was the dead of the night, and Amber was wide awake. She'd slept the seven hours that she needed, and now she felt like she hadn't quite done enough complaining for the day. "There's no carpet in here! Why isn't there a mini fridge? Do you have any idea what comfort means? Cause this ain't it!!!" She yelled at the guard closest to her cell. She'd heard Erry had been put in a cell quite a ways away. Oh well, she knew how most of this would play out. But in the meantime...

"WILL YOU SHUT UP!" The guard yelled at Amber. She giggled. "I KNOW A SONG THAT GETS ON EVERYBODY'S NERVES, EVERYBODY'S NERVES, EVERYBODY'S NERVES! I KNOW A SONG THAT GETS ON EVERYBODY'S NERVES, AND THIS IS HOW IT GOES!!!" She shouted. Man, this was fun. "I KNOW A... Wait a second. Who the heck are you? Oooh, don't tell me, are you Durza" She said happily. He, on the other hand, didn't look all that happy.

"Why yes I am, and let's find out exactly who you are?" He said, extending a probe. Amber thought he might do that, so she put up a pretty solid barrier. Stacey had been teaching her. She concentrated on the song Glamorous by Fergie. Durza reeled back as if struck by the odd words and tune. "What was that? Who taught you mind barriers? Well, that's of little conseequence to me, I guess. Why were you traveling with the dragon rider?"

"Umm, cause it was all a big accident. I didn't do it! I've been framed!" Amber said, promptly bursting into tears. "It was all my older sister's best friend's boyfriend's cousin's fault! He was her ex-boyfriend!" She said, imitating a soap opera she had seen recently.

"Okay." Said Durza, sounding a little scared. "How about we try something new? Either you tell me all you know about the rider and the rest of your companions, or you'll never get out of this cell for the rest of your life." He said, regaining his composure.

Amber stopped crying. "Good." said Durza. "It was Katie! She did it! It wasn't me!!!"She shouted anxiously.

"Fine the. It was your own choice, just remember that." Durza said, obviously exasperated, and strode out of the jail cell. The guard watch then changed. Her old guard breathed a sigh of relief, barely audible. Amber giggled and called out "I'll miss you, Turlough!" (she had found out his name about an hour earlier, due to her screaming "WHAT'S YOUR NAME?" in his face until he answered) Turlough ran. The new guard looked like he woould rather be submitted to a thousand tortures than be where he was right then.

"Oh, don't worry, I won't do to you what I did to him." He ignored her. "Ya know, it's sort of impossible to keep that up. I think next watch they're going to give me a hardened veteran for a guard, in hopes that I won't drive him insane." Amber said, bored. "You want to hear my life story?" She said brightly. "Great! Well, when I was born, I lived in..." She started. Four hours later..."And then we were attacked by urgals and Erry and I were brought here, then I annoyed that other dude, then Durza, you know, that shade, came and talked to me. Cheery chap, isn't he? He was fun to talk to. Then You came, then I assureed you that you would be treated differently, then I asked you if you wanted to hear my life story, then I told it to you, and here I am!" She finished cheerily. "Oh, and by the way, I'm Amber. You want to hear a song?"

_Meanwhile..._

"What are we going to do?" Sarah said to Stacey. "Well, for starters, you and Saphira are going to do what you are supposed to do, without us. We'll get Amber. And don't worry about us, or else we'll make you eat really hot peppers without anything to drink, okay? Oh, and by the way, there's an extra person that needs rescuing as well, so Saphira needs to get ready for carrying three people."

"Hot peppers, huh? Well, at least it's only one threat this time. And your so worried you can't even think of a good one." He said, all the while preparing for the ride out of there after getting Erry. "I guess we're a little too worried about our young friend to make very good threats this afternoon. No matter. You two just stay out of my way and get Amber."

"Whatever." Rose said. "Ya know, Sarah, I think if we play one more prank on Stacey before leaving, that might make me feel better. You up for it?"

"Sure I am!"

"Aright, well, here's what I have planned..."

_Back at the jail..._

"THIS IS THE SONG THAT NEVER ENDS!!! IT GOES ON AND ON MY FRIENDS!!! SOME PEOPLE STARTED SING IT NOT KNOWING WHAT IT WAS AND THEY'LL KEEP ON SINGING IT FOREVER JUST BECAUSE IT'S THE SONG THAT NEVER ENDS!!! IT GOES ON AND ON MY FRIENDS!!! SOME PEOPLE STARTED SINGING IT NOT KNOWING WHAT IT WAS AND THEY'LL KEEP ON SINGING IT FOREVER JUST BECAUSE," Amber was having fun singing to this night guard. As she had guessed, they gave her a hardened soldier as a guard in hopes she wouldn't drive them insane. Man, were they wrong.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." A voice seemed to slither towards her. Wait a second! She knew that voice...

"Not you again! I already said that I didn't do it!" She said, screaming and crying once more. "WHY DOESN'T ANYBODY EVER BELIEVE ME?!? I'M SO ALONE IN THE WORLD!"

"Yes, yes, we've heard all about that, and now I would like to ask you a serious question."

"BUT I AM BEING SERIOUS! WHY WON'T YOU BELIEVE ME?!?" Amber cried histerically.

"Fine." He said. He seemed to have given up. Woah. He walked out, and Amber followed. Then she ran back to the corner, resuming her act, because as she peeped of the cell, she saw loads more soldiers. They were carrying a figure. More like dragging, actually. How she pitied that sad soul. It wasn't Arya, so Erry must be pretty far away. As far as she could see, she was on the opposite end of the place as him. ARYA!!! _Oh, dang it, now Erry's gonna go all googly-eyed,_ She thought._ That sucks._

Then she saw, at the very back, two somewhat short (they were her same height) soldiers dressed for war, with barely any skin showing. That's odd. Oh well. Then one lifted up his visor. Wait a second, she recognized that face. That was Rose! Rose winked, and motioned to the person next to her. That must be Sarah! Once the rest of the soldiers had passed through the door, Sarah and Rose fell back. Sarah held up some keys, and opened up the cell door.

Just then, some soldiers walked in through the door. Perfect. "Well, this wasn't on our agenda, but we'll have to make do, won't we?" Sarah said.

Amber jumped out the cell door, tossed the keys in her pocket and slammed the door shut. She promptly pulled a light saber out of her pocket, as did the others. Together, they got out of the jail, and snuck out of the city by using their hand-dandy... wait for it... invisibility cloaks!!! Once out, they ran to the campsite and sat down to wait for the guys, while keeping everything packed. Except for their radio. Oh well. That could wait, as could their disco ball. They deserved a good party.

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A/N Hope you enjoyed it, and it was long enough. Review, and I'll try to update more often. That's a promise!


	10. Sarah's Alone Time With Stacey

A/N I lied. I went on vacation, than forgot about the story. Sorry, won't happen again. Hopefully. Anyways, on with the story!

Disclaimer: I don't own (Anything!!! Not even Sarah and Rose, just Amber, who barely is mentioned in this chapter anyways) , and never will.

**THIS CHAPTER IS IN HONOR OF SARAH'S BIRTHDAY!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY SARAH/KYO!!!**

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**Sarah's Alone Time With Stacey**

"I'm going hunting." Announced Stacey. He didn't seem to be in a particularly good mood.

_All the better for me to go... _Thought Sarah.

"Alone."

"Dang it!" said Sarah.

"What was that?"

"Oh, nothing."

Although he didn't sound believing, Stacey turned around and left, checking behind him as he went. A few seconds later, Sarah announced she was going exploring.

"Great." Erry yawned sluggishly. Hey, whoever said he was listening?

"Okay..." Both Rose and Amber said together. They were both in on Sarah's big plans.

A few minutes later, Sarah was attempting to soundlessly follow Stacey. She wasn't doing too well. In fact, when Stacey stopped and stood, stock-still to listen, Sarah bumped right into him, muttering about 'That stupid branch'. "What do you think you're doing here, you bloody girl? You just scared away the rabbit I was going to get!"

"Good! Think, if you had killed that rabbit, then it would never return home, and it's babies would have died, so there would be no generations after it to carry the family name, and you very well might have killed half of the rabbit population!!!" Sarah yelled. This was met by a blank stare. "Fine!!! I'm never speaking to you again!!!"

"Thank you." Stacey muttered.

"I heard that."

"I was under the impression that you weren't speaking to me."

"I changed my mind."

"Perfect."

"You know, I can be serious sometimes too." Sarah said, uncharacteristically serious.

"I didn't know that."

"Do you like it better when I'm serious?"

"Much."

"Okay."

Suddenly, an odd jingle started playing. Stacey found the source in his pouch. It was a cell phone, vibrating and loudly playing Rockstar by Nickelback.

"SARAH!!!"

"Ooh, I love this song! I didn't know you had a cell phone!"

"A cell... what?"

"Where did you even get one?" She asked, answering it. "Oh, hey Amber. Yeah it's fine. Alright, see you then." She said with intervals while Amber talked. After hanging up, she said, "You really should charge it, it's nearly dead. Yo ucan borrow my extra one when we get back to camp."

This, apparently was too much for him to handle. Without another word, he picked her up, tied her to a tree, and stalked off. "I'll be back to get you later."

"Okay." Sarah called. She pulled out her cell phone and pushed speed dieal four. Somewhere Stacey's other phone was ringing. The one she'd hidden herself to make it especially hard to find. She distantly hear him curse as Lipgloss started playing...

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A/N Okay, writers block, Twilight, and Harry Potter are to blame for me not updating. Sorry, and I hope you liked the chapter. 


	11. Bacon and Eggs

A/N I know I haven't updated in FOREVER, sorry! I hope you enjoy this chapter, and I'm sorry, but I probably won't continue this story for many more chapters. Anyways, thanks for all the nice reviews, and I've really enjoyed typing this!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything you recognize, although I really wish I did own the song We're Brothers Forever, from that American Idol tryout! As well as the AWESOME Dane Cook (he's Sarah's, by the way), or the genius of Monty Python and the Holy Grail or David Cook, although if I did I would die because he is so amazing...

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Bacon and Eggs

It was a sunny day, and so the girls were outside playing their own version of volleyball. Erry and Stacey were watching as the girls proved that they could have fun even in the midst of the desert.

"Can't we go yet?" Erry whined. He was always the party pooper.

"NO!" All three girls yelled.

"Besides, _we_ are having _fun_, and there is nothing you can do to stop us! Mwahahaha!" Yelled the over-hyper Sarah.

"Okay..." Stacey said, concerned about his safety, and therefore backing away slowly.

"STACEY!!! I didn't see you there, hon, come play with us!" Sarah yelled again.

"Hon?" Stacey sneered. "Now _that's _unoriginal for you. And no, Sarah, I will _not_ play with you three."

"Why not?" Rose asked. "Give us a good reason why you shouldn't play with us!"

"First, I don't want to. Second, it doesn't look like fun. Third,-"

"Fine! _Don't_ play with us then! Be that way!" Said a very upset Amber. She didn't like to lose, and she was losing. Miserably. Sarah decided to cheer her up with a little singing.

"I know, let's sing We're Brother's Forever!!!"

"YEAH!!!!!" Amber screamed, overly enthusiastic.

(the two of them are singing now with arms around each other)

"I AM YOUR BROTHER  
YOUR BEST FRIEND FOREVER  
SINGING THE SONGS  
THE MUSIC THAT YOU LIIIIIIIIIIIIIKE

OH...

WE'RE BROTHERS 'TILL THE END OF TIME  
TOGETHER FOREVER 'TILL THE END OF TIME

OH...

I AM YOUR BROTHER  
YOUR BEST FRIEND FOREVER  
SINGING THE SONGS  
THE MUSIC THAT YOU LIIIIIIIIIKE

OH...

WE'RE BROTHERS 'TILL THE END OF TIME  
TOGETHER OR NOT, YOU'RE ALWAYS IN MY HEART  
YOUR HURTING FEELING IN YOU  
WILL REIGN NO MOOOOOOOOOORE

OH...

(repeat over and over and over and over...)

In response, Rose rolled her eyes, and the two guys proceeded to look scared.

(they finish singing)

"I LOVE YOU BROTHER!!!"

"That was fun," Sarah mumbled, distracted by Stacey. "I like that song..."

"Okay, Sarah, enough Stacey-drooling." Rose demanded while steering Sarah away from the frightened guy.

"No, let her Stacey-drool! I want to see if they become the nothing fights couple!" Amber proclaimed excitedly.

"No. Amber, I know you have been wanting to try this out, but there is no local Walmart, K-Mart or Target nearby for the use of the unhappy couple to buy jelly, nor does he have a car she can leave her CD's in, okay? Okay." Rose nearly yelled, exasperated with the both of them.

"Fine. I'll just B and E your tent tonight after your asleep..." Sarah mumbled, and Amber's eyes shone excitedly. Nothing was better than a good bacon and egg. _Nothing._

"You're such an idiot. You're all idiots." Stacey mumbled, but not quietly enough. Amber heard him.

She braced herself by putting her left leg out slightly. "Yeah, because you're just Mr. Right, telling us all how we're all just floating around in the Sea of Wrong. So throw me a lifeline here, give me a clue on how to be right." Stacey looked happy with himself, thinking he had won the argument. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. It was _far_ from over. He spoke as Amber put her hand to her face and nodded for him to continue. She then pivoted, took four steps away, and spoke quietly before moving again. " Well you're stupid like your father."

"What's that supposed to mean?!?" Stacey screamed.

At the exact same time Sarah yelled, "OH!!! You just got _served_!!!!! Nice one, Amber!"

"Huh?"

"Eh, you won't ever get it anyways. It's a Dane thing, right Sarah?"

"Right, Amber."

"Now. I'm off to watch David. NOBODY better bother me, or I will officially beat the crap out of them. That was your warning." Rose rolled her eyes. Her and her David Cook.

"Whatever. Can I watch too?!?" Sarah asked. American Idol is AMAZING.

"Alright, we'll talk after you two have watched your show, alright?"

"Kay."

* * *

**After American Idol. The guys are asleep.**

"Okay. Plan Bacon and Eggs is in action. Do we all remember what we're supposed to do?" Sarah whispered.

"Of course I do," Amber whispered fiercely back while Rose looked as though this was all absolutely hilarious to her. "We grab the stuff, sneak over to the guys, and..."

"What? I thought you knew the plan!" Sarah said over dramatically, looking theatrically shocked.

"Umm... I was watching David?"

"Whatever. Okay, let's go."

The three of them went secretly over to their tent, heated up some microwave bacon, and grabbed eggs from the mini-refrigerator. They then proceeded to walk over to where Erry and Stacey were camped out. they spread bacon all over them and around them and then, after going a safe distance away, launched the eggs with their special egg-launcher.

"WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!" Erry yelled, while Stacey sat up and swore.

"You just got B and E'd!"

"Oooooooh!!!"

"Gotcha!!!"

"Crap, this stuff'll NEVER come off!!!" Stacey yelled.

"You're such a girl." Rose said.

"Am not!!!"

"Yes you are. Your brother is a girl, which unofficially makes you a worse girl."

"I don't have a brother!!!"

"That's what _you_ think."

"AAAH!!! Can't we all just go back to sleep?! We'll be in the mountains tomorrow, and if we want to be able to get there by tomorrow night, we need to be well-rested!" Eragon yelled.

"Whatever. See you guys tomorrow." Amber said, officially ending the encounter.

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A/N And that's it!!! Hope you enjoyed, and much thanks to Sarah! Review!

Padfoot


	12. The Minds of Teenage Girls

A/N I love D.C.!! He came home and I was so close to going to the baseball game and the free concert and all that stuff, but I didn't get to see him and I'm frickin' mad and upset and I'm going to go cry in a corner because the amazingness that is MY David Cook got away! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!Okay, so maybe I'm overexaggerating a TEENSY little bit. Anyways, sorry for the long wait, Sarah and I worked uber hard on this one, it's exellent, hope you enjoy, still don't own _Eragon_ or really anything associated with it, Charlie the Unicorn, American Idol, youtube, various music pieces/songs/artists (including Avenue Q and David Cook although I wish I did!), et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.

* * *

**The Minds of Teenage Girls**

The small company in the shadows of the humungous mountain range woke up right before dawn and quickly packed up their camp, and ate a hurried breakfast from atop their horses, or ATVs, in the case of the three girls. The urgals were still in pursuit and so they were going full speed. At least, the guys were.

"C'mon, pansies! You can go faster than that!" Sarah jeered.

"Yeah, I thought you were trying to stay _out_ of reach of the big scary mosters!" Amber agreed.

"Shut up! These aren't magical, so they will have to do! Turn around and scout ahead. Do something useful for a change, why don't you?" Stacey yelled back, highly frustrated.

"Oof!" Sarah had fallen off the dang ATV. The machine quickly bacame out of sight amongst the dunes, headed straight for a quickly approaching and momentarily forgotten about army of bad guys.

Suddenly they were among big green things, commonly known as trees and bushes. Sarah was currently riding on the back of Rose's ATV, until they all dismounted their various 'steeds' and continued to make their way on foot, because the two 'big, manly men' didn't trust the girls to retreive a tool that could get them through quicker than how fast they were going. Instead they ran, because the three of them knew what was going to happen next, so they let it play out in front of them.

"Got any suggestions?" Erry yelled.

"Just pretend we aren't here! You have to do this the way you would if we weren't here!" Rose cried back.

"But you _are_ here, and now you have to help us out!" Stacey stated, annoyance creeping up at the arguement and lack of descision. Now that they'd finally stopped arguing about the slavers they were going on about this!

"Well, if we do, it will mess everything up! WE want to continue the story!" An uncharacteristically serious Amber nearly screamed. Stacey just stared. He'd never heard her say something so serious before.

The shock didn't last long. The boys finally got to thinking, and finally made it to the Varden.

"Ooh! Hi Orik!" Sarah said to the dwarf standing next to Erry. Then her eyes wandered to a few more feet in front of Eragon, to where her beloved Stacey was being guarded by one of the twins. That turned her look of glee to one of pure loathing. "I hate you, you know."

"It would do you well to stop talking."

"Whatever. What if I don't feel like not talking?"

"Shut up! Or he will die!"

"Fine." Sarah said. Then in a much quieter voice, "Barzul." Rose looked at her, shocked. Sarah had made a point to always cuss in English, so as not to alarm the characters. Orik also looked at her oddly. Where had this girl learned the dwarves' language?

"You must be tested." The Bald One spoke with the utmost authority.

"Yeah, yeah, we know. Start with him first." Amber interjected, pointing at Erry.

"You will NOT interrupt me!" The Bald One angrily said.

"'Kay."

He turned towards Erry. As the girls waited in silence, Amber decided to look around and see if she could spot anything familiar. This place looked nothing like she had thought it would. She briefly wondered what her family was doing at the moment. The flow of words brought her back to where she was.

"Well, is he to be trused or not?"

"He... is not your enemy." As the sighs broke out throughout the room, The Bald One turned towards Sarah. "Your turn." he sneered, confident.

"Alrighty then!" She cheerfully spoke, then concentrated carefully on an ipod blaring 'The Inernet Is For Porn'.

The Bald One balked at the music and decided that he didn't really _want_ to know Sarah's mind. "In order to determine if you are our enemy or not, I must first examine your friends' minds." At this, a dwarf came up and held Sarah to ensure that she wouldn't run off, similar to the way Stacey was being held. The Bald One turned to Rose.

She nodded, and he came into her mind, only to find that she was concentrating on a yaoi manga she'd brought along and had been reading earlier. The page was particularly offensive, and so he quickly exited her mind and turned to Amber.

"It seems that it is your turn." She smiled innocently and sang along to David Cook singing 'Innocent' in her mind as she watched the performance. The Bald One decided (and it was a good decision) to exit her mind as well.

"Well? Are they trustworthy?" Orik asked anxiously.

"I cannot determine that. They must be locked in a room until further notice."

"Aw, crap. That kinda sucks huh?" Sarah said sarcastically. None of them had been expecting anything else. "Oh, and The Bald One, if you want to listen to more of that song..."

"Yeah, I've got the manga with me if that one page was confusing and you want to read the whole story!" Rose chirped.

"Mmhmm, I've got my ipod with me and you can listen to all of his songs if you'd like!" Amber said, smiling once again.

The Bald One ignored them and started dealing with the stubborn Stacey.

After finally coming to the conclusion that he was not going to submit, the five of them, along with Saphira, were locked up in this dongeon - looking room. They hated it, but the girls made themselves comfortabe (with the help of a comfy couch, plasma TV, and this week's episode of Death Note) and settled in for the long night. Tomorrow, they knew, was going to be difficult.

A/N Sorry again for the long wait, and please review!


	13. Showoffs and Introductions

A/N I know, I know. It's been a year. I'm sorry. But here you are! Enjoy!

* * *

Showoffs and Introductions

Suddenly, a crash sounded, and Stacey and Erry bolted upright.

"What the HELL was that?!" Stacey shouted.

"We woke up," Said Sarah.

"And we were hungry," Said Amber.

"But the food didn't taste good." Rose said.

"So I threw it at the wall........." Sarah interjected proudly.

"Why, Sarah, did you think that was a good idea?" Stacey asked.

"Well, the food wasn't good, and they weren't listening to me, so a loud noise would get their attention. Plus, I knew you would wake up, and then I could have fun with you," Sarah glanced at Stacey, smiling before realizing her mistake. "Oh! Not that way. I just wanted to bother you! Why would i do that? I mean.... Don't answer that........." She ranted.

"Okay.... that was officially the wierdest morning yet," Erry concluded with a nod.

"But now I'm really hungry, so let's have poptarts!!!!!" Sarah shouted.

Right that second, one dozed warriors, followed by Orik and one of the Twins marched in. The girls squealed and ran behind the TV, which the warriors looked at in fright. However it was nothing in comparison to the laughably frightened looks on their faces when they gazed upon Saphira.

They were marched into the hall, and told to ride single file on horses. The girls simply looked at each other and said, "I don't think so," before pulling out their pogo sticks and hopping on. The Twin, fearing another attack on his mind like the day before, allowed this.

Soon, they came to a set of doors. The entire group waited for the girls, who were hopping slowly towards them, to catch up. When they did, Orik asked Erry, "Do they always do this?"

He nodded sadly. "Unfortunately, yes." The girls glared at the two of them.

Erry got on Saphira, and the girls realized this woud mean he would be getting all the attention and quickly thought of a plan.......

5 minutes later...

The crowd roared wildly for Erry and Saphira, as the three girls prepared for their prank. Rose and Amber quickly tossed another firework into the pile.

The crowd quieted as a white streak flew high into the air, and they made sounds of surprise when the white light, at the peak of its flight, shattered with a loud 'BOOM' into a thousand little white lights that all faded into nothingness. Thinking this was Erry, they roared. Erry looked dumbstruck, so the crowd turned to the sky, alight with new small lights that drew a picture, a big arrow pointing to the girls. the crowd now ignored Erry and cheered for the waving girls.

Firework after firework danced in the air, including a vibrant hot pink one that aid "ERRY IS A MARY SUE". The girls began to laugh, and Rose whispered :here it comes" to Amber. Sarah merely wondered what they were whispering about.

Soon, a thick, bright red stream of light streaked into the air, lighting up the entire room. 'This one _must_ be it,' thought Sarah.

The light split in two, and the first one exploded. It simply said 'STACEY IS SEXY'. The second one exploded a few seconds later. It read 'SARAH LOVES STACEY'. The other two began laughing, Sarah's cheeks were inflamed, and Stacey glared at Sarah. The crowd exploded into massive cheers as a grand finale came out, an explosion of lights, dotting the roof like points on a map, before shattering with a soft sound into millions of smaller dots that fell and faded into nothing right before nearly hitting the people down below.

Sarah started hitting Amber and Rose with a small book she found. The two were screaming and running, until one of the Twins yelled, "STOP! We are here."

They had reached a large gate, which opened up to a passageway that was four stories high. The entire party gasped as they saw the bright red jewel above them. It was the most beautiful thing the girls had ever seen in their lives. No words could do it justice.

Several minutes later, they all arrived at a door, and all but the guards were ushered inside. In there was a study, and standing behind the desk, the girls knew this unfamiliar man was called Ajihad.

He spoke. "Welcome to Tronjheim, Eragon and Saphira. I am Ajihad. Please, seat youselves."

All of them sat in the chairs, and Ajihad inspected his guests. As soon as his eyes rested upon Rose, she piped up. "Hello, I am Rose, and these are my friends Sarah and Amber, they're my best friends, and I'm so glad to finally meet you! I mean, we've heard so much about-" She was cut off as the Twins stepped up beside Ajihad and he began to speak, his words directed at the girls and Stacey.

"You four have placed me in a difficult position by refusing to be examined. You have been allowed into Farthen Dûr because the Twins have assured me that they can control you and because of your actions on behalf of Eragon and Arya. I understand that there may be things you wish to keep hidden in your mind, but as long as you do, we cannot trust you."

"We understand your position. All we ask is to be kept together, and to be allowed to see Stacey and Erry." Amber said.

"Stacey and Erry?" Ajihad asked.

"Me and him," answered Eragon. "Pay no mind to them, they like to test people."

"Hey! I heard that!" Shouted Sarah.

"Okay, let's get back on task," said Ajihad, all business. "What says you?" He asked Stacey.

"You wouldn't trust me anyway," said Stacey defiantly.

Ajihad looked extraordinarily angry at his words, and began to speak loudly. "Though it's been twenty and three years since it last broke upon my ear... I know that voice." He stood, and the Twins began whispering like teenage girls. "Remove your shirt," ordered Ajihad.

The girls gasped, and Sarah smiled widely. Amber whispered something in her ear and she turned bright red. Their livelihood, however, was broken when, unsurprisingly, Ajihad realized who Stacey was and freaked out.

After a rather long conversation, Ajihad had an order ready for his guards, and called them into the room with them. "Take him," he said, pointing at Stacey. "To a windowless room and bar the door securely. Post six men by the entrance and allow no one inside until I come to see him."

Here all three of the girls latched onto Stacey and held on tight.

"If he goes, I go!!" yelled Sarah.

"I'm not going anywhere without Sarah!!" said Rose.

"I stick with them!" agreed Amber.

Eventually, the guards were able to extract Rose and Amber off of Stacey. However, Sarah might as well have been super-glued to Stacey, because she would NOT let go of him (he was still shirtless). They allowed her to go as well, and told the other two they would be staying with Eragon because they had no magic and were not considered a threat. However, they would have guards all around them at all times.

They resigned with a quiet sigh, and hugged Sarah while sneaking a laptop and cell phone to her, complete with webcam so they could talk. Soon Ajihad ordered everybody out except for Erry and Saphira. The two remaining girls went outside and stood by the door, plotting ways to spend their newfound free time with Erry....


End file.
